Hitting milestones

We've hit 30 weeks! At m/w appointment today I:

-found out that I DO NOT have gestational diabetes. Yay yay yay!

-found out that I am borderline anemic. Boo boo boo. Luckily, our midwives try to correct this with diet before prescribing giant constipation pills.

-gained about another 1/2 lb. in two weeks. I'm liking my pace, but know it will likely start accelerating in the next few weeks. That's okay, too.

-discovered the baby has been head down since the last midwife appointment - or at least he was today. Good baby!

I decided that I will take at least a picture a week of the belly for your viewing pleasure until the end. (I took a self-portrait Monday morning but haven't dumped it off of my camera yet.) A decided lack of belly shots - and pictures of me pregnant in general - suddenly made me feel very sad since I know I will not be getting pregnant again and want PROOF when this boy comes out that I was the one who grew him.

I am finally here sitting on my bottom after what feels like a very, extremely long day. Strangely enough, I feel great all day long (mostly), but as soon as I sit down, I am suddenly overwhelmed with tiredness. Not exhaustion - just extreme tiredness. The weather growing cooler and fallish does not help the urge to crawl into a pile of blankets when I come home. But alas, there are things to do, pick up, pack up (we're going away again this weekend out to my parents' house), so, yeah---I come home and go some more. But, I'm thinking as long as I can move, I should move. Yes? Makes sense to me.

An update on baby kidneys. We had an u/s last Wed., and surprise! The kidneys actually resolved. We are relieved, but were never panicked in the first place. Still--it is good news that we now do not have to subject a squirming newborn to an ultrasound or an appointment with our dull-as-dirt pediatric urologist. At my m/w appointment yesterday, I only gained about 1/4 lb, a much welcome relief from the 6 I had gained at my last visit. Measuring spot on at 28 1/2 weeks, heartbeat strong, and baby seemed head-down during my appointment, although I'm sure that has since changed.

Hey--I think I'm going to have a baby. It feels more real than ever all of a sudden.

Busy Bees

Clearly the start of school was a bit much to allow me to have any semblance of free time with which to blog. We relished our last days of summer but, as always, were ready to go back to school by the time the end of August rolled around. Theo is happily back with his beloved babysitter. Seriously---he cries for her and whines, "I want Kaaaate! I want my Kaaaate!" I'm pretty sure he's never sung such a song for his mamas, but it's okay. I love that he loves where he is during the day when we can't be with him.

My first week back as a large pregnant lady was...exhausting. But I made it through. I have an exhausting schedule this year (5 classes in a row with a lunch break after 3). At least I'll be missing for three months of the year when son 2.0 comes.

We spent the Labor Day weekend in Baltimore with S.'s brother, our sis-in-law, my in-laws, and our nephew. We hit Sesame Place on Saturday. Oh.My.Goodness. You only need to witness the long embrace between Theo and Elmo to see that the trip was totally worth it. The kids did great. We ended up springing for the character luncheon - way expensive for really crappy food, but so worth it. Again, I point to the Elmo hug.

Oh yeah, and I'm in my third trimester now. Gulp.

Their grandmother insisted on the matching cousin outfits. I had to admit, it's pretty cute.

The weight gain game

Ugh. I do not like stressing out about this, but in the past 5 weeks of pregnancy I have gained....6 pounds. Ugh ugh ugh. The midwife was totally unconcerned - I'd been gaining about 2 pounds every month. I had to go 5 weeks before seeing the m/w because of our beach vacation, where, apparently, it was not wise to eat ice cream every.single.day. She chalked it up to being on vacation, sitting on a beach, and just generally not moving as much in the heat. And the ice cream.

Yep. Looking for a healthier way to indulge my sweet tooth. I go in for the 3rd (!) trimester screening tests in 3 weeks or so, and need to have another ultrasound before that for a kidney check. Sleeping officially kills my hips, even with the giant maternity pillow which I find only marginally comfortable. Still, I feel blessed to have had my pregnancy go this way so far, and still being able run after and catch up with this kid:

P.S. - just had a cup of vanilla ice cream with hot fudge. Baby: 1 Willpower: 0

An Open List

Terrified that we are going to be scrambling around too late and last-minute to get everything we need, S. and I realized that, at 24 weeks, some stuff needs to start getting done and happening. So far we've:

-compiled a pretty good list of boys names

-read through a few birthing books

-been to all of our regularly scheduled midwife appointments and had an ultrasound (with a follow-up to occur in a month or so for a kidneys check)

-ummm....

Yeah. So, what should probably be done or in the process of being done by now is:

-setting up Theo's new bedroom

-interviewing (at least, if not hiring) doulas

-finding a birthing class/instructor to work with that suits our needs (no first-time mamas birth classes - it would be way too boring)

-exercising regularly, or getting into some mini-yoga/stretching routine so I continue to feel physically comfortable since I will be working up until my due date

-declaring to my job how long I plan on taking for maternity leave (which is still a question mark)

What else should be on this list? We are list people. Maybe we are over-reacting and we've done just the right amount of stuff. We don't need the hubub of registering or decorating a nursery (although we'll need a few new things - new bumpers and new blankets since the ones we have are definitely T's). So that leaves us with..what else? An open question I pose to you, readers.

(Almost) back

Where have we been? Take a guess! (Hint: it's sandy and has no freaking internet access - not even one single network we can suck off of for 10 minutes! ) We're actually still away, but finally coming home tomorrow after two weeks. I realize how ridiculously lucky we are, to be able to get away for a two-week vacation. I hope we'll be able to continue this with two kids so they both get to experience life at the beach, a place we both grew up loving to go.

Safe behind a sand fortress from the crashing waves

New best friend, cousin (twice removed? three times?) Leah

New hobby - banging on anything with sticks and calling it a drum

Soaking up the sunshine

Happy babies frolicking on the shore

Wow, he's really big for his age!

We hear that all the time. And now we know why: our kid is 90% larger than your kid.

Two-year stats:

Weight: 32.2 pounds - 90th percentile

Height: 35 inches - 70-80th percentile

Head: don't remember, but in a normal size range - 50-60th percentile

Big boy. So much to love, sometimes his cloth diapers come flying off his substantial buttocks. I am not joking. That velcro wears out fast.

Also, My Pregnancy Boobs: A Limerick

My chest size is a'creeping

Even though they aren't yet leaking.

My boobs are a'growing;

Sometimes it's the only pregnant part showing.

Bra shopping it is as their size is leaping.

I know my meter is off, but at least I have the rhyme scheme. Seriously though, are these things going to KEEP GETTING BIGGER?!

Theo is a two-year-old, as evidenced by videos and pictures and other proofs that yes, he-is-two. We had a party on Saturday and try as we might to make it a simple affair, it never turns out this way. Behold the enormous bounce house we decided to rent for the occasion:

The house of bounce

Oh yes. Despite the incredible downpour (and I am by no means exaggerating here about this downpour), the kids loved it, all the slippery wet fun of it. You can imagine I did not partake, but did go in when there were no kids by my own to jump and chase after.

A choo-choo themed birthday yielded a choo-choo train cake made by S.'s mother (it was rocking awesome), and a million Thoma.s the Tank Engine toys and..the piece de resistance...a gorgeous handmade train table created by S.'s parents. It's gorgeous and Theo basically hasn't left its side since Saturday.

Cake eating

Cooling off in the drink bucket full of ice cold water (after most of the guests left!)

Train table

From above

We leave for vacation on Saturday and don't know what internet access will be like, so this may be it for us for a while. Oh yes, and I forgot to mention that I am OVER half-way through this pregnancy and starting to look and feel pregnant always. My hands and arms fall asleep all over the place when I sleep---did this happen to anyone else? Do I just deal? It's really annoying. Other than that, can't complain except for the occasional cranky uterus growing, growing, growing.

Guess Who's Two?

Approaching Two

Two years ago at this moment, S. was in labor - but the nurse and midwife had just caught on to that. Her pizza was long-gone, and labor was in full-swing. After that, things start to be blurry. In 7 hours, we would have our baby. In 7 hours, we will have our two-year-old. Whoa.

Baby

Two-year-old

Pool Belly

This is me at 19 weeks exactly, in S.'s aunt's pool, feeling much relieved from the heat and humidity. I think this is the first belly shot I've posted? So you really have no comparison, but I can assure you--I am bigger than when I started! (Try not to stare at my white-ass legs - you may be temporarily blinded. Though I am Italian in temperament, I am not in pigmentation.)

Cooling off

Swimming fool - you cannot keep this kid out of a pool

Well, that was a surprise...

So not expecting this, but this baby of mine? The one in my belly? A boy. A BOY! ANOTHER BOY! I say that like I don't want that, but I'm thrilled. We wanted another boy. But my gut instinct was screaming to me, girl, girl, girl. I'm glad we decided to find out at our ultrasound today, because I would have continued to insist I was having a girl and then be shaken to my core when he came out a he and not a she.

A little brother for Theo.

The irony in all of this? I now own the two and only male heirs to my family's last name. Sure, the boys' (ohmygod that sounds so weird) names are hyphenated with my last name and S.'s, but still. There is one, single boy cousin I have and guess what? He has three daughters. Oh me oh my. The lesbian saves the family legacy. Got to love it.

On to the medical part, the ultrasound was good. Everything looks normal except...kidneys. Jeez, this sounds familiar...if I took time and wasn't sweating my arse off as I sat here with the laptop on my lap, I'd go back and link you to some of the posts we wrote in the last two and a half years about Theo's ongoing kidney issues. Fortunately, they mostly resolved within his first year and a half of life, and this (where one kidney is larger than the other) is not so rare and 50% of the time clears up before birth. Theo fell into the other 50%, obviously, but at least we already have a pediatric urologist and a pediatrician who knows the deal. So, not great but not the worst news, and everything else is measuring perfectly and looking normal. Big sigh of relief all around.

And now to retreat into the air conditioning.

Meditating on Birth

Now that our ultrasound is mere hours away, I've started to read pregnancy books and think about birth. It's time, people---do you see that ticker? 18 weeks. That's almost half-way through. Oh wow!, as Theo would say.

I daresay we have a unique situation over here in babymaker town. On one hand, I have experienced birth in a first-hand way, but not in this first-hand way, and obviously vice-versa for S. What she likes and expects out of this pregnancy is a lot different from what she liked and expected from her own. And...vice-versa. So what may happen differently here? I am reading different books. I'm starting to investigate (and suggestions are wildly welcome here) more meditative-centering-hypnobirthing kind of methods of birth to help me attain it naturally. S. knew from the get-go she wanted a natural birth and, through her sheer tenacity (ahem, stubbornness), she would do it. I cave in much more easily and need a lot more resources and tools at my disposal to use to sustain myself through birth, and am in general not the kind of person who heavily depends on others, so I want to be able to withdraw into myself.

This sounds really weirdo, I know. But I know myself, and am trying to learn more and more about myself and what might work for me. I'm not a meditative person by nature, but I can sort of already anticipate me experiencing birth in this way. But, as I've also learned through Theo's birth and reading all of your wonderful birth stories, the unexpected needs to be, you know, expected.

Thus ends my pregnancy rant of the day.

How do you anticipate yourself birthing?

5-second Post

Oh lookie! I have like, 5 seconds to sit down and write something! But just 5 seconds, as we're getting reading to leave for a long weekend for the 4th.

To recap:

The wedding we so busily prepared for the last week and a half went off without a hitch. Everything looked beautiful, everyone had a great time, and the food was ridiculously yummy.

I am 17 1/2 weeks pregnant and in less than a week, we get our big ultrasound to, if we're doing it, find out the sex and see what's going on in there. I still haven't decided but am kind of leaning toward finding out to make life easier. Any bets?

Oh, and I think I finally look pregnant. Honestly, I've just looked kind of chubby for the past 17 weeks. S. has been bemoaning my lack of baby belly-ness. I have been incredibly negligent and un-insistent on having belly shots taken every week--honestly, I don't think I've taken a pic for like, 5 weeks. Bad, I know. I'll try to start being better and maybe actually post something.

Did I mention Theo isn't two but may as well be? Yeah. Any good suggestions for toddler books?

And some pictures, because though he grows more independent every day, he also grows cuter.

Theo helping his Auntie Stacey with pancake making

Dirty boy in the garden (he did this to himself, I swear)

I'm here but busy.busy.busy as a bee, which, incidentally, stung Theo for the first time last week. Now, whenever he sees a picture of a bee he goes, "Bee! Boo boo!" and points to his arm with great distress in his overly-expressive face. He is a laugh-riot when he's not making us pull our hair out with extreme exasperation. Those terrible twos? They have squarely moved in although we have a month to go.

We're helping our bestests plan and execute their wedding picnic that's on Sunday, hence the buzzing about and lack of posts. Previous excuse was end of school year which, thankfully, is here. Big sigh of relief.

Happy Summertime and we'll be back soon.

(Incidentally, I've still been reading all of your posts. It's so much more relaxing than writing!)

Things that made my cry recently:

My hormones

Watching images of the BP oil spill

Listening to something on NPR (probably StoryCorp or something)

My wife (hey, it's the end of the year--we are super-stressed teachers right now and set each other off easily these days.)

Things that are getting cooler:

Maternity pants - no more zippers for a while

Feeling the baby - and S.'s super-sensitive hands feeling her/him, too

Deciding whether to find out sex - what do you guys think? We didn't with Theo, and S. is dying to find out. Every day I flip-flop between it being a boy or a girl. I'll be surprised either way.

The end of the year - one-half day of classes left, 4 days of final, 2 days of "professional development", then freedom to breath easy for a while.

Ahhhh.....

Checklist

A check-ish list of accomplishments during our long weekend:

• 2 gardens planted
• 3 grilled meals consumed
• 1 birthday party attended
• 1 13-week pregnant lady swatting away bugs that would not go away
• 3 days of perfect weather
• 1 lawn mowed
• 2 friends that came to sleep over
• 1 parade watched
• 1 flag waved, and waved, and waved

I'm no anchorwoman..

I'm starting to show. I guess it's time to break the news to work. I already told my department head and principal, and both seemed genuinely thrilled for us, but I haven't told any co-workers besides my pregnant buddy, but I really think that it's time. I mean--I have no pants left to wear, people. Time to go shopping.

I really don't like telling people "news". I know, I'm weird. What's the most tactful, least-embarrassing way to break the news?

Blow Up

Apropos of nothing, I turned comment moderation OFF because I found it so annoying, but I'm still getting possibly more annoying blog comments, so will likely be turning it back on, just to warn you.

So, where have we been? We've been..exhausted. The only reason I am able to type this right now is because I happen to be home with Theo for the day since our babysitter's daughter caught the nasty puke-your-brains-out bug going around S.'s school. NOT fun--so we really hope Theo does not get infected with that nastiness. Last week, his whole body BLEW UP with a red, red rash, accompanied by a running nose. Our doc called it some kind of coxsackie virus, but S. suspects it was fifth's disease, so today I went to the hospital lab to get some blood drawn just to check.

However, I am going to go with everything being all well and good on the pregnancy front. My intense hunger has subsided-for now-and we heard the heartbeat on Monday at our first midwife appointment. Yes! I'll be 12 weeks Sunday. That is rather mind blowing. S. is concerned that I haven't "popped" yet--only my ass and boobs seem to be doing the popping--but since I really don't have any summery maternity clothes yet, this is fine by me. Although, I don't know how much longer I can squeeze into my work pants, and I only fit into one pair of jeans. I will also add that my t-shirts look ridiculous on me and all need a size upgrade.

Another thing that BLEW UP in our face this week was some shocking news. Our donor--as in the one we used for Theo--became available again. And the bank DID NOT let us know, like they had said they would. We only found out via a message someone sent S. through the DSR. I didn't quite know what to do with this information. We agonized over what to do once our embryo transfers failed, and we were faced with having to choose a new donor if I wanted to become pregnant next. It took us a really long time to choose, and it's worth pointing out that we made a LOT of phone calls to our original bank inquiring about when our donor would become available again. I know that I was meant to be pregnant with the donor we used, since it worked---and it really will be fine. But there is just this little bug somewhere in the back of my head like--there are going to be half-siblings of Theo out there now-and they won't be mine.

Anyway, onwards we go. We're going to Boston this weekend with my sister (well, she lives there, so we're going to her apt.) then all visiting the Children's Museum. I have so many fond memories of visiting the Museum with my mother as a kid, so it's exciting to get to take Theo for the first time. Enjoy the lovely weather all!

Did you know that....

...it is our FOUR YEAR bloggiversary? I really didn't imagine we would be still blogging, after blogging through the painfully long conception of Theo, S. being pregnant, Theo's birth and babyhood, and now my nascent pregnancy. Crazy, no? There are some blogs I've been following from the beginning, and some I've just found, and others who have sadly just disappeared from the blog world after enduring too much pain. I ache for those friends we started with whose journey did not end up the way they wanted or expected.

On Saturday, we attended a huge picnic to celebrate our hospital's 20-year IVF program. There were nearly 300 IVF-conceived kids there. We got to see our doctors and nurses again, get a free lunch, and free admission to the city museums. It was really wonderful and--amazing--to see how many people's journeys happily ended in family. What was surprising, though, was that there were hardly any other lesbian couples there--we only saw a few. But I know many of them use our doctor for IUIs and are lucky enough to stop there. It made us a little teary-eyed and oh-so grateful for our little lovey.